Friday, February 02, 2007

Some random misspellings I found amusing...

SFL wants another post, so another post he shall have. Poor SFL.

When I was on my vacation a few months back, I kept a brief log of all the misspellings and grammar errors I saw. Now, I think these are very funny, but perhaps all of you will not. Too bad. I'm going to post them anyway, because it makes me happy. Muahahahaha!

Here goes:

On a roadside diner's sign: "Fried Osyters!" (interesting delicacy! Where does one find osyters?)

At a little shop in Williamsburg, VA: "Penut Shop" (well, if you're spelling phonetically, I guess this works just fine...)

"Scooter's sold here" (now, what, exactly, is being sold that belongs to Scooter? And for that matter, who IS Scooter?)

In a Western Wear shop in PA: "Hand craved" (yes, well, *I* crave some decent spelling right about now!)

"Doll's and Etcetera's" (oh dear Lord in heaven above, keep me from saying something I regret)

"Jewelry and Accesorie's from all over the World" (see above)

...and my personal favourite...

"Casual Atmoshpere"

OK, now let's dissect this last one. "Casual." Very well, casual. That's easy enough -- not very formal. Now, "Atmoshpere." At -- mosh -- pere. A cryptic message, perhaps? At, meaning "I'll be at..." Mosh, referring to the typical mosh pit? I'm just guessing; what else does "mosh" mean? Pere...hmm...perhaps the message writer is French? Pere means father in French, so all this just goes to say, I suppose, that the aforementioned most casual and relaxed personage may be found at his/her father's mosh pit, in case anyone might be looking for him/her.

And most recently I found this little gem at a nearby Target: "Cherokee Ulimate Flat-Front." The sign was referring to boys' trousers, and the thing that rules out any new "Ulimate" brand name is found on the sign just below the first, on which may be found the correct spelling of Ultimate.

Then...here is the bobby-dazzler, folks...

While shopping yesterday (ugh!!!), Mum and I walked by a little booth that offers monogramming services. I was about to keep on going right past it, but then stopped dead in my tracks (no, I was not actually dead).

"PERSONILAZED GIFTS!"

My eyebrows rose toward my hairline. "Mum!! Come look at this, come look, come look!"

"What?"

"LOOK!"

I pointed to the embroidered sign and started whooping with laughter, adding some enthusiastic foot-stamping for good measure.

"Oh my," my mother muttered, surveying the sign.

My stomach began to hurt from the strain put on the muscles in that region. I crossed to the opposite side of the booth and began laughing even harder when I saw an embroidered t-shirt reading "MOMY'S ANGELS."

Now, unless there is a person out there named Momy...I am forced to assume that the person who embroidered the shirt actually meant "Mommy."

Be afraid, America -- be very afraid. Don't ever go to this monogramming booth, unless you want your name misspelled. For instance, we could end up with "SLF" or "Calir" or "Hattei"...or, horrible thought..."Marry"!

*sigh* The inferences one might draw from that misspelling are scaring me.

I get upset enough about misspelled signs and shirts, so don't even get me started on pushy people who think it's fun to set me up with some misbegotten, buck-toothed, hare-brained excuse for a person of the opposite gender whose intelligence quotient roughly equals the number of dates I've had this year!

*takes deep breath*

I'm all right, really I am.